Friday, October 14, 2011

GOP Race 2012

The other day Jericho asked me, with great concern in his voice, if my blog was turning into a Mom Blog. Oh dear. It is tough not to blog about my child and being a mom since that occupies roughly 125% of my time, thoughts, and energy. He suggested I write about something political.

So here is my breakdown of the GOP prelim race. 

Michelle Bachman- All defense and no offense. Her french tips are Real-Housewives-too-along. And I don't trust people from the midwest.

Herman Cain- New guy that hasn't been tainted by being a career politician. Knows some stuff when it comes to business and economics. Makes a mean pizza.

Newt Gingrich- Tainted by tainting himself in the 90's during the Clinton admin. Such a longtime career politician that all I can see when I look at his face are caricatures from political cartoons. And the man's name is Newt. NEWT! How could we expect the world to start respecting us again when our Prez shares a name with a lizard famously referenced in Monty Python.

Jon Huntsman- Appointed by Obama as ambassador to China. Mormon although hasn't decided what definition of Mormon he falls into. Like Mitt Romney except he's a Utah Mormon instead of a Massachusetts Mormon. And without the awesome hair. Or the winning politician's smile. Or the supporters.

Ron Paul- He's kind of nutty and I've never really been sure what political party he should belong to. And he's 75. I think over 70 should be considered "of advanced political age" and therefore be required to take additional medical testing to assess one's ability to not die while serving in office.

Rick Perry- Serious contender for the bid. A real Christian. Strong following and a lot of supporters. A strong push with his jobs plan. But I don't trust people from Texas.

Mitt Romney- Strong frontrunner for much of the race thus far. Focuses on jobs and the economy. Serious business knack. Some consider him too moderate to be a Republican. Some consider his teeth freakishly white. Little known fact, his full name is "Mittens".

Rick Santorum- I don't know much about this guy. His last name sounds like a prescription drug.

There are a bunch of other people on the official list but I've never heard of them. These are really the only ones that are causing any buzz. If you would like to have an actual educated and official description of the candidates, please consult pretty much any other source. Happy voting friends!


  1. HAHA mittens. I am a huge fan of your political styling there. If nothing else you've given me a good jumping off point for my own research.


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