Thursday, March 27, 2008

While some refer to rap as merely 75% of "crap"...

I have recently changed the online radio stations that I listen to during the work day. I am now on the XM Radio "Hit List". I'm aspiring to be more hip, more down, more jiggy. I have learned a couple of things, things I've known from my days in the Top 40 world of high school... but now, years later, have realized have not changed much. And those unchanging factors in the music bizz are the necessary elements to land you a hit Rap/R&B track. The following are a few notes on the requirements... feel free to cover any that I have missed. yo. check it:

1) Recite your own name at least 7 times in the song. 2 of those times must be included in the intro to the song, along with any and all other artists you decide to "feature" on your track. It is advised that you have around 12.
2) Spell something. We don't care what it is. But spell anything and your song is bound to be o-f-f-d-a-h-e-z-z-y-f-a-s-h-e-z-z-y.
3) Turn completely innocent, everyday phrases or objects into something dirty. This is a family show so I won't give examples. But you know to what I refer.
4) One word: Timbaland.
5) "everyone's got a drug dealer on speed dial..." - this is actually a lyric from a Nickelback song. Go figure.
6) Aside from the designated word-to-be-spelled... the title of the song as well as your own name should be mispelled. The "rrr" or the strategically placed apostrophe(s) are encouraged.
7) Language fillers are not only permitted, but condoned. (Uh! Uh!, Yah!, Eh!, Er! Ah!)

*disclaimer* I claim no authority on the music world. Nor at any point in this post did I state that I don't like or support this type of music. I find myself hip-hopping with the best of them. It makes for great music. All genres carry their stereotypes... Maybe my next evaluation should be about skinny jeans, faux-hawks, cutters, and hating your parents.

1 comment:

  1. If you please please do an evaluation of faux hocks I will post a picture of myself with one.....maybe.


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